


Rushing Home (Connor Murphy x Reader)

by WhereIPutTheOtherStuff



Category: Dear Evan Hansen
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, F/M, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Substance Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-02
Updated: 2017-12-02
Packaged: 2019-02-09 16:13:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12891705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WhereIPutTheOtherStuff/pseuds/WhereIPutTheOtherStuff
Summary: Inspired by a request I received on tumblr where Connor discovers the reader's alcohol abuse.





	Rushing Home (Connor Murphy x Reader)

The start of another week at school. The weekend had been hard so you were glad for the break. You could escape into the sea of fellow students who were busy with whatever they needed to do. Invisible to everyone apart from those who mattered.

You rummaged through your locker to find the books that you needed for your class. Suddenly you felt somebody tap your shoulder, making you turn around quickly to see who it was. It was a tall thin boy who wore a black hoodie, skinny jeans and boots. His long brown hair was tied loosely into a bun, he must have been annoyed with it this morning as it was usually down. Connor Murphy, your best friend since, well it felt like for forever.

"Hey Connor." you said as the corners of your lips curled up into a smile that didn't quite reach your eyes.   
"(Y/N) I really missed you." he said as he opened his arms and gave you a quick hug. He normally wasn't so touchy feely in public but you knew that he had to spend the entire weekend bonding with his family. Guess you weren't the only one to have a bad weekend.  
He looked at you for a moment, studying your face. That beautiful face of yours. Something was off but he wasn't sure what. Should he let it go or not?

"Are you ok?" he asked cooly as if he was just dropping it into normal conversation.   
"Just my parents at the weekend... They were... Very trying." you replied with a sigh. You left it at that as you did not want to go into more detail in the middle of the school hallway. Connor gave an understanding nod. Right, you thought to yourself, try to stay positive.  
"I better run to class. Have a great morning Connor and I'll see you later." you smile, waving at him whilst you walk down the corridor.

Sitting down at your desk, out of the corner of your eye you notice someone standing over you.   
"(Y/N) how's it hanging? Have a fun weekend?" said the annoying voice of Jared. You knew that in his mind he thought that he meant well but you really couldn't deal with his sarcastic jokes today. You looked up at him, staring into his eyes.   
"No. Not I did not." you reply in a serious tone which told him to back off as you weren't in the mood. He turned around and hurriedly sat down at his desk. The lesson was a long one. It gave you a lot of interesting facts but the teacher could have spent less time talking about them and more on practical investigation. Looking around the room, you notice a couple of girls stare at you and talk to each other, with their hands covering their mouths. You sighed as you heard them mention your name, perhaps looking out of the window was a better idea. As you stared at the field, there was an annoying yet all too familiar dryness in your throat that you were trying your best to fight the urge to quench.

The morning lessons had really dragged but you were glad that they were finally over. Looking around the hallway, you spot the familiar friendly face of Evan. You and Evan had been friends for years, there was a shy innocence to him that always made you smile.  
"Hi Evan, how is your day going?" you ask as you walk up to him.   
"(Y/N). It has been going g-good though I have already been given so m-much homework this morning." he chuckled.   
"I'm just going to sort out my books but I'll see you in the cafeteria." you say smiling at him.

Walking down the corridor someone pushes into your shoulder hard as they travel in the opposite direction. You thought it happened by accident until you heard them speak.  
"Watch it freak." said a deep but juvenile voice. You ignore them and carry on walking, they were really not worth your energy.   
"Freak!" yelled the boy again as you could hear his approaching footsteps. Quickly somebody walked in front of you holding his arms out in front, so your back was pushed up against the lockers. He was a big guy who you vaguely recognised as someone who played on a school sports team. Trailing behind him were a couple of the girls who had been not so secretly talking about you in class.   
"Hey I'm talking to you." he said angrily, spitting the words at you. You did not know what his problem was but the two girls snickering behind him had probably put him up to this. Looking at his face, he was expecting an answer.  
"Oh, I'm just stunned at your lame name calling." you say with as much sarcasm as you could muster. His face formed into a frown and anger began to burn in his eyes.

Raising his hand and placing it on your face, his thumb on one of your cheeks, two of his fingers on the other, grabbing your jaw. The pressure hurt your face.  
"You little bitch." he growled.   
"Piss off." you managed to say through gritted teeth as you pushed his hand off of your face.  
He was really starting to get on your nerves. There was a familiar nagging thought in the back of your mind but you tried your best to suppress it.   
"I have an idea. Maybe save up your money so you can move out of that hovel that you call a home and buy yourself some proper parents whilst you’re at it." he laughed mockingly and the girls joined in. That was it, they could make fun of you but bringing the touchy subject of your parents into conversation sent you over the edge. Your hands clenched into fists.  
"I said piss off!" you yelled as you pushed past the boy. Before you knew it you walked down the hallway and out of the door. You just had to get out of there immediately. You waited until you had left through the exit door before you finally let the tears that had formed in you eyes, roll down your cheeks.   
You couldn't help it, you were weak. After trying to be strong all day you finally gave into the urge. You needed to get home away from prying eyes. You had promised yourself that at the weekend was going to be the last time but you knew deep down that would never be true.

Little did you notice with all of the drama, that Evan was still in the hallway, hiding behind his locker door. Now with his eyes wide with panic he scrambled his way towards the cafeteria in a desperate search for help. As he sprinted towards the tables, he bumped into the familiar tall frame of Connor who nearly spilt his drink.   
"C-c-c-con." Evan stuttered. Seeing Evan's current state, a look of worry formed on Connor's face. He knew that Evan was an anxious guy but he had never seen him like this. Calmly he placed a hand on Evan's shoulder.   
"Calm down and speak slowly. What happened?" Connor asked with a comforting smile.   
"I-it's (Y/N). Jake was picking on her. C-called her a f-freak. Said that she should move o-out of her home which he called a hovel and buy herself s-some n-new parents. Now she's walked out of school." Evan quickly spluttered out.   
Connor’s face fell as his breathing started to quicken. He was angry that you were picked on but worried that you were out there somewhere upset and alone.   
"Shit" Connor said with dispair in his voice. "Evan, tell everyone that I threw up during lunch hour and had to rush home." he said before running out of the Cafeteria and then the school. He had to go right away. Connor knew that you usually wanted to be alone when stuff got too much for you but this time it was different. This time you didn't tell Connor that you had left school.

Standing in the school parking lot, Connor frantically dug around in his bag for his phone. He dialled your number just to find out where you were. Needing to know that you were safe at the very least. Holding the phone to his ear he impatiently waited for you to pick up. There was no reply, perhaps the connection wasn't very good? He dialled a second time and there was still no answer. His heart began to beat faster as worry started to set in. Third times a charm he thought to himself. Relief washed over him as you answered, however all that could be heard was loud breathing on the other end before you hung up. This certainly did not put his mind at ease. Thinking on his feet, Connor decided that if you did not want to talk perhaps texting would be the way forward.

Connor: '(Y/N) are you ok?'   
You: 'yE im dine'   
Connor: 'Where are you?'   
You: 'Home hut dont cOm over'

Connor became very suspicious he knew that you were a person who checked your text messages atleast twice before sending. Something must be wrong as your messages were filled with errors. Even though you said not for him to come over, Connor couldn't risk it. He got into his car and turned the key as the engine roared into life.   
The truth was that despite being your best friend, Connor had never actually been round your house. You always arranged to meet up with him at his or outside somewhere. He knew where you lived but he had never been there. Though he did think it a little strange that you always avoided him visiting your home but he respected your decision.

Pulling up outside, he looked at your home. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. Perhaps it was a little smaller than expected but every home looked small compared to the Murphy's. As Connor got out of his car and walked up the path, he noticed that it looked like your parents were out. Oddly the front door was unlocked as it swung open when he gently pushed it. Was it so it was ready for your parents return? Or had you forgotten to lock it? What was also strange was that every door inside the house was shut. As if you were trying to keep something out or to keep you in. Connor's palms were getting sweaty with nerves as he was unsure where to start searching. The house was silent and had an unnerving atmosphere. The quiet was interrupted by the sound of movement upstairs.

Somehow Connor gathered all of the bravery he had as he started to quietly climb the stairs. The only thoughts replaying in his mind were, I hope (Y/N) is safe and I need to help her. Looking at the doors on the landing it was easy to tell which room belonged to you. It was the one which had old stickers of butterflies on, whose edges were starting to curl up and peel off. Connor took a deep breath to steady his nerves as he was unsure what he was going to face on the other side of the door. He wanted to be the calming and supportive best friend that he always had been to you. Slowly he opened your door.

He was instantly hit with the almost eye-wateringly strong smell of alcohol. Far more pungent than any brewery that he had visited on a lame family trip. Your bedroom was small, a single bed on one side and a desk on the other. Your walls were a pale blue and dotted with a few photographs of you and Connor and even less of you and Evan. That was when Connor's eyes fell upon you.   
You were sat trembling on the floor, with your back leaning against your bed, knees brought up to your chest and your face resting down upon them. Quietly sobbing. The floor was littered with various bottles and cans. Wine, beer, spirits, it didn't matter, it all went down. This was your way of coping when things got too much. You drank until you forgot the day's events.   
Connor stood there wide eyed in shock for a few seconds as his mind attempted to process what he was seeing. Despite being your best friend, he had no idea that this was your way of coping. You always seemed so strong and energised. It broke his heart to see you like this.

"Hey" Connor said in a voice that was barely louder than a whisper as he crept over towards you. Trying his best not to startle you. You buried your face deeper behind your knees, trying to make yourself as small as possible. In an attempt to disappear completely. You did not want him to see you in your current state, a complete mess. At this moment in time you hated yourself for giving in to the urge to drink so soon after the last time and you did not want Connor to hate you for it too.

He slowly sat down on the floor next to you and gently placed an arm around you in comfort.   
"No!" you cried as you pushed your shaking hands into his chest, making him lean back slightly. You didn't mean it and Connor knew that it was just because you were distressed.   
"Shh. It's ok, I'm here now." he said soothingly as he started to stroke your hair with the hand that was over your shoulder. Connor wanted to reassure you and was prepared to give you all the time you needed. Addiction and substance abuse was something he knew all too well. Sometimes being alone with your thoughts could be the worst thing to do.

After sitting like that for a while, you slowly lifted your head so you could look at Connor. His eyes looked a little red and watery, which he quickly wiped with the sleeve of his hoodie as he noticed your movements.   
"Hi Cookie." he said as his lips curled into a smile which you weren't sure if it was a bit forced because of the current situation. You smiled back as the silly nickname he gave you years ago. Which he would now usually only use it when he tried to cheer you up. He looked at your face. You felt like shit and you knew that you looked it. Your face was red because of the amount of alcohol you had drank and also because you had been crying. Your cheeks were stained with now dry tears.   
"I'm sorry I-" you start to say in a voice raspy with exhaustion before Connor cut you off.   
"There is no need to apologise. I just wish that I could have gotten here sooner." he said in a caring tone. You rested your face on his chest as the sound of his even breathing began to steady your own.   
"I know it is hard but... Just give me the heads up next time before you start... You know. I am always here if you need me." Connor said and you knew that he genuinely meant it. You nodded in response.

"Thank you" you said quietly as you wrapped your arms around his waist. He responded by hugging you tighter. You both sat there quietly. Connor's actions reassuring you that you were worth more than you thought.   
After a moment had passed Connor broke the silence.   
"Why don't I make you a nice cup of coffee?"   
Confused when you didn't reply he looked down to see your eyes shut. Your chest gently rising and falling as you slept.   
He chuckled at the sight. You were finally safe. Connor hugged onto you a little tighter before his own eyelids slowly began to shut.


End file.
